Michael Moore's New Film "Quite Political"

Popular teller of unpopular truths Michael "Dudley" Moore has unveiled his new movie at the Coventry Movie Festival before a stunned throng of standing ovators. The movie, which features Moore in the central role as the assassin known only as "The Democrat", was described as "possibly containing a hidden agenda" by US political analyst Dexter Dry.

We spoke exclusively to Moore as he waited to speak to several other news outlets. We asked him whether the film had been enjoyable to make.

"I went through hell in the gym to get that body" he laughed, "but it was worth it. I didn't want some stunt guy or body double to deny me a single second of slaughtering Republicans."

Does the "Volume 1" subtitle suggest that he's preparing a sequel?

"If Bush is voted back in then the people will get to see another two hours of me in a figure hugging cat suit with my weapon in my hand" threatened Moore.

Does the quantity of blood spilled in the film not concern him?

"Not at all - the blood was recycled from members of the NRA shot by legally purchased firearms."

George Bush was said to be "uninterested" in either the movie or the controversy as Dexter's Laboratory was about to start on Cartoon Network.

Michael Moore is 46, George Bush is a cunt.