Bush Has Faced Carved into Rock

American president, that Bush bastard, has provoked controversy by having his face carved into historical Australian landmark, Ayres Rock. Mr Bush was to be immortalised alongside fellow presidents at Mount Rushmore when he changed his mind.

"It is not true that Mr Bush was watching Discovery Kids" said Whitehouse spokeshomeboy, Karl Woof. "It is untrue that he saw a program about Ayres Rock and it is a lie that he decided to have his face added to the site."

Mr Bush, having decided to have his face added to site, was warned that Ayres Rock is in Australia but seventy two hours of briefings failed to persuade him that Australia isn't in the southern United States.

"We protested the carving" said Australian protester, Rolf Littleboys, "but all the bloody Yankees did was drill little holes in the ground and warn us that they were sure they could smell oil."

Australia's Prime Minister, Bob Shrimp, asked Mr Bush for an explanation and was told that "America has nuclear weapons and a President who wants his face on a rock. Which do you want in your goddamn little country, hmm?"

"It is untrue that America has nuclear weapons" explained Mr Woof, "and it is an unconditional lie that we have or have ever had a President Bush."