Episode Fourteen

2nd November 1977

Reggie tries to destroy Grot by acting in a very shocking manner. It doesn't work with his friends and family because they know him too well. He then tries to shock complete strangers, but this doesn't work either. So it's time for him to say goodbye, return to the coast and forge a new identity - this time with Elizabeth accompanying him...

Reggie fed up with success of 'Grot'. Tries to destroy it. Result - even more success.

"...by serving Welsh people".

"...by calling the new shop Grotfabrieken Rubbishhausen" (Reggie finishes this sentence for him).

"...without asking for 10p for a cup of tea, guv"

"Escaped puma, Chessington North"

Less than 3 years ago, the first Grot shop was opened in Climthorpe. There are now almost 60 shops in Britain and Europe. Reggie is interviewed by Colin Pillock on BBC1's Pillock Talk, by Sheridan Honeydew on ITV's The World Tomorrow Today and by Peregrine Trembleby on BBC2's Hi Finance. Mr Herbert has applied for the job of new North Eastern Sales Area. A new Grot shop has been opened in Hamburg.

Tony says that "It's Panic City today - rushed off our feetsville". Tony describes Reggie's TV appearances as "Great!" and David likewise as "Super!". On the morning after, David describes Reggie's performance on Hi Finance as "Super!".

"...flower person"

"...champagne person"

Tom says that working for Reggie has made him happy - "I'm a happiness person".

Jimmy wants a few scraps when he joins the rest of the family in saying "hello" to Reggie and Elizabeth.

Joan tells Reggie that she finds him very attractive. Reggie describes himself as a congenial liar. Reggie talks to Elizabeth about the time he left his clothes on the beach (Episode 5). Elizabeth tells Reggie that he is more important to her than anything else. Elizabeth tells the family that she and Reggie are going to Woking for a flower show, in order to disguise the fact that they are going away. Reggie thanks Linda for being a nice daughter, and Tom for being married to Linda. Elizabeth mentions that she has married Reggie twice. Reggie finds himself at the same spot on the beach as before. He and Elizabeth call themselves Mr and Mrs Gossamer.

Reggie on "Pillock Talk"
Reggie kisses Joan in front of his wife
Reggie on "The World Tomorrow Today"
Reggie kisses Joan in front of her husband
Reggie on "Hi Finance"

Reggie plays a childish prank on an employee

Reggie tries to shock by gaying it up...

...and dragging up
Goodbye old Reggie, goodbye old Elizabeth

Hello new Reggie, hello new Elizabeth

I didn't get where I am today without recognising this tramp

Faking your own death is the new rock and roll