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Episode 5 of the first series, initially shown on the 20th May 1990.
The cast is largely the same as the previous episode so we have Bertie’s sporting Aunt Dahlia playing host to all the broken hearts and goings on.
Once more Bertie finds himself lending hands to Gussie Fink Nottle and Tuppy Glossop, though whether they want his help or not we will soon see.
Madeline Bassett – the sort of girl who might well come up behind her husband at the breakfast table, put her hands over his eyes and say "guess who?" – and Angela Travers are the pretty young things exercising Bertie’s negligible grey matter this week.
The episode opens a short time after the previous one ended.
Jeeves has stayed behind at Brinkley so Bertie is having to look after himself for once. The Drones can no doubt supply him with all the meals a chap could possibly want but it is Mrs Beeton who is teaching him to make a pot of tea.
It isn’t going massively well. The kettle refuses to be filled.
Though he has the world’s simplest cooker – that’ll help his cause.
He’s found the tea. At least he fairly sure it’s the tea.
The phone rings. He’s a little hesitant about answering. He tries practicing a few opening remarks but the thing just won’t stop interrupting.
The door bell rings – Bertie tries to pretend he isn’t in but Barmy can hear him whistling (its actually the kettle but Barmy is barmy). He then tries pretending he’s Jeeves and he’s lucky he doesn’t have to convince anyone more intelligent.
The phone rings again and Bertie persuades Barmy to answer it and pretend to be Jeeves.
It is Jeeves on the phone – he is round the corner and is coming round to see Bertie.
Meanwhile, the kettle has continued to boil and has filled the kitchen with unexpected steam.
And become unexpectedly hot while boiling.
Jeeves arrives and Bertie tries to impress him with his newfound knowledge.
Jeeves explains that he’s been sent to London by Aunt Dahlia to persuade Anatole the cook to come back to Brinkley. Bertie assumed Jeeves had been sent to persuade him (Bertie) to come back to sort everything out. Bertie is most offended.
Bertie sets off for Brinkley at once while Jeeves visits Monsieur Anatole for lunch.
Bertie finds Tuppy at the archery board firing angry arrows and talking about how Angela loved him up until the time she went to Cannes but has been distant ever since. Conclusion – she met someone else while holidaying in France.
But Bertie knows this to be twaddle – it so happens that he and Angela were inseparable in Cannes. Had there been anyone snooping around, Bertie would’ve been sure to see him.
Bertie goes on to explain that he’s always been devoted to Angela and that when they were children she used to call him her "little sweetheart". Tuppy begins to jump to a most unfortunate conclusion.
Anatole is back in residence at Brinkley and Aunt Dahlia is simply dripping with gratitude for Jeeves and his marvellous brain.
Indoors, Jeeves unpacks while Bertie explains his latest plan. Or rather delivers a complicated metaphor about biffing tiger cubs and the possible emotions this would engender in a tigress.
In short Bertie is planning to take Angela to a secluded spot and roast Tuppy thoroughly. He will let it be known that Tuppy is a thoroughly rotten egg without a redeeming feature to his name. Angela will then leap to Tuppy’s defence and the recent coolness between them will be a thing of the past.
Jeeves isn’t convinced but Bertie explains that he has personal experience of this very phenomenon. He was standing by the pool in France when a girl he knew slightly commented that a fellow bather had perhaps the silliest pair of legs she’d ever seen.
It turned out that the girl and the chap with the legs were engaged and had had a bit of a tiff. Hearing him attacked like this she turned her fury on Bertie.
So down he goes to a very frosty living room where he finds the silent household picking at afternoon tea. He invites Angela for a walk and tells her he has much to say that is not for the public ear. Tuppy is so angry that he knocks over a tray and gives Uncle Tom – listening to the wireless – a frightful shock.
Tuppy follows them to their secluded spot and listens in the bushes. He gets angrier and angrier as Bertie dissects every inch of his appearance, his manners and his personality.
Angela spots Tuppy hiding in the bushes and immediately agrees with everything Bertie has said. Bertie is confused – his plans don’t normally go wrong this quickly.
She goes inside and no sooner has she gone than Tuppy leaps out of the bushes with a face like thunder. Bertie’s attempts to brazen it out don’t go very far.
He tries to suggest that eavesdropping isn’t very English but Tuppy shoots that one down by saying he’s Scots. Then Bertie explains it was a plan and that he had no reason to knock Tuppy for real. How about, Tuppy suggests, Bertie being in love with Angela himself. Bertie is shocked.
Just when it looks as if he’s about to be pulled inside out, he fires off one last, desperate defence. His affections are engaged elsewhere. He tries to avoid giving any more details but Tuppy insists.
Madeline Bassett. And what’s more it is only a couple of days since she turned down his proposal in this very garden. Tuppy is shocked.
They arrive back at the house and Angela scores another cheap point by leaving some sandwiches on the patio as she’s sure Tuppy will be hungry again.
The next morning Bertie announces that Tuppy and Angela will have to sort out their own affairs. Today is the day to get Gussie and Madeline fixed up. He goes on to say that his previous plans had ignored the fact that Gussie was a poop.
He explains to Jeeves that Gussie doesn’t drink alcohol. Even the great man is a little taken aback. Drink is – says Bertie – essential for anyone wanting to propose to the woman he loves.
While enjoying a game of croquet he tells Jeeves that he intends to lace Gussie’s lunchtime orange juice with gin. Jeeves disapproves and explains to Bertie that he once knew someone who gave a parrot port and the bird suffered some rather startling consequences.
Bertie reminds Jeeves that Gussie isn’t a parrot and announces his intention to lace the orange juice today. Today is the day of the Market Snodsbury Grammar School prize giving and a bit of gin is just what Gussie needs to get through such an ordeal.
He creeps down to the larder and pours a whole bottle of gin into the jug of orange juice.
Later that afternoon, at the School, Jeeves gives Bertie the good news – Gussie and Madeline are engaged. The gin did its work. It was most fortunate that Jeeves found a chance to add half a bottle of gin to Gussies luncheon orange juice. It dawns on them that Gussie is now roughly 90% proof and about to address several hundred people.
What do you think – has Gussie had a bit too much to drink?
The headmaster gets thing started and mispronounces Gussie’s name. This earns him a sharp rebuttal and sets into motion one of the great scenes of comic literature. He starts by leading the boys in three cheers for what a beautiful world this is.
The prize giving is a fiasco. He starts out by verbally abusing Bertie for being a pessimist, moves on to recommending marriage to a small boy who has won a prize and accuses the winner of the scripture knowledge prize of cheating. Madeline cannot take any more of this and runs from the hall in tears.
While dressing for dinner Bertie informs Jeeves that Gussie and Madeline are no longer engaged. Jeeves return the favour by filling Bertie in on what happened during the remainder of the prize giving.
Bertie is putting the finishing touches to his ensemble when a furious Tuppy arrives, hell bent on finding Gussie. The latter has now become engaged to Angela.
He goes to find Angela and ask her what the bally blazes is going on. He’s also a bit fogged as to where all the staff are. The latter question she can answer – they’re at a ball at Kingham Manor. The former she is more reluctant to talk about.
She claims it would be "fun" to be married to Gussie.
Back in his bedroom, Jeeves explains that it is a well known practice for people to get engaged shortly after a break up. It is what’s known as a gesture. His Uncle George… but Bertie isn’t interested in Uncle George. He wants Gussie. Luckily, the newt fancier is closer at hand than first thought.
An angry Tuppy arrives and decides to search Bertie’s room for any sign of Gussie.
Bertie is triumphant when Tuppy finds his wardrobe empty. His joy turns to despair when the other wardrobe door squeaks open and Tuppy spots his quarry. The chase is on.
Bertie heads downstairs and is having a drink with Aunt Dahlia – who is in mourning for the loss of her daughter’s future – when Jeeves brings a note from Miss Bassett.
She accepts his earlier proposal of marriage. He is shaken to the core.
As Bertie is enjoying a nightcap, Jeeves explains his plan. If the fire alarm bell were to ring in the middle of the night, the occupants of the house would instinctively save the thing most dear to them. Tuppy would save Angela, Gussie would save Madeline and everyone would be back in their rightful romantic places.
At the appointed hour Bertie creeps out and sounds the alarm.
The effect is not quite as he’d hoped. The guests saunter out without so much as a romantic gesture.
Worse is to come – they discover the door has been closed and they are locked out. The servants are away for the evening and there is nothing for it but to spend the night in the garden.
Tuppy suggests driving over to the ball but finds the garage doors are locked too.
Jeeves has a scheme – one of the gentlemen might be disposed to bicycle over to the ball and get the back door key from the butler.
Bertie’s nine mile ride takes a turn for the worst when it starts raining.
Eventually he reaches the dance and is told that the butler left the key with Mr Jeeves. He said he wanted to go for a late night stroll in the garden.
Bertie rides back to Brinkley in the foulest of moods. When he arrives he finds the house all lit up and a party going on inside.
Bertie’s plight is the source of much amusement from two freshly affianced couples.
Bertie is having a warming footbath when Jeeves explains that he didn’t expect the fire bell to solve all the problems at Brinkley – it was merely a preliminary. Once the ladies and gentlemen realised they would be stuck in the garden all night, they would turn their simmering anger towards Bertie and forget whatever disputes they had had with one and other.
When Jeeves suddenly announced that he’d found the key and it dawned on them that Bertie was riding 18 miles on a bicycle in pouring rain they would be so delighted that any remaining barriers would melt away. Bertie is relieved to hear he is no longer engaged to Miss Bassett. He chides Jeeves for the roughness of his methods though.
It is the second half of an adaptation of the novel "Right Ho, Jeeves".
There is less going on in this episode than in the last but it moves along at a good pace and ensures that almost everything from the novel gets included. Gussie scaring the pants of Anatole by climbing onto the roof and gesturing to him through his bedroom skylight being the obvious exception. It's odd to think that Madeline Bassett is at the heart of the episode and yet I'm not sure she has a single line of dialogue in the whole 50 minutes. She's in shot a lot and does a fair bit of reaction-acting but she doesn't actually say anything. It's taken me eighteen years to notice that. Overall, it isn't quite as good as last week but it is still very dashed good. And for once, the new material (the early business in the flat which has been added to bridge the artificial gap created by splitting the story into two parts) is amusing, in keeping and worth watching.
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