Flash has quite literally been stabbed in the back by the woman he wants to sleep with. Normally they just stop phoning or bad mouth you on the internet or set fire to your clothes. Luckily the stab wound hasn’t left a mark.

Flash’s friends arrive and scare off all the funny little forest people.

Barin carries Flash away while Zarkov and Happy threaten the tree folk with guns.

But there are more of these tree men waiting behind them…

…who are equally easy to scare off.

The high priest is told that Flash and co have escaped. He orders that they must not be allowed to leave the forest – the patrols must kill them on sight. His little sidekick salutes, bows and minces off.

"She is an Earth woman in body only" says the priest as he brings Dale before the big man. Typical male attitude if you ask me.

Word is to be sent via the signalling tree to Ming that Dale has been captured.

This is a man who enjoys his work.

Meanwhile, Flash has taken his undamaged shirt off so Zarkov can tend to his wound.

Dale has been put aboard a rocket ship and is being taken to the palace by two of Azura’s crack troops. At least one of whom is professional enough not to giggle while on duty.

Flash and his team storm the temple and grab one of the priests. They demand to know where Dale is.

He refuses so Zarkov threatens him with the incense of forgetfulness. He calls it "lithium" but that’s used to treat manic depression not to brainwash people into worshipping big statues of ugly folk.

The priest gives in and tells Flash where Dale is and where to find Barin’s rocket ship. It is in an area known either as the "Vale of Piles" or the "Vale of Pines". Possibly neither.

Whatever it is called they soon find it. Only one guard – that’s lucky.

No – wait – there are more of them. For a race with no women they seem to breed quickly and plentifully.

Flash has a plan. It involves Happy going over to the clearing and shouting "Yoo hoo!" in a camp voice. It really does.

And giving them a limp wristed wave.

The primitive homophobes chase after him. But it is all a trap. Flash and the gang are waiting to ambush them.

A fight breaks out.

Flash hurls another midget.

They win and clamber aboard Barin’s rocket ship.

On board, Zarkov explains something to Flash. He sounds drunk – he’s slurring a bunch of technobabble and Buster is really struggling to keep up.

Dale has been brought to the palace.

She is taken across the light bridge to Azura’s throne room. Ming will no doubt want to perve over her.

"You shall be our honoured guest until Flash Gordon comes to claim you" says Azura to the glassy-eyed Dale. She’s apparently under the impression that Dale is a piece of luggage. Either that or the evil witch queen being shamelessly and repeatedly manipulated by Ming the Merciless isn’t quite the feminist icon we’d been lead to believe.

Meanwhile, on board the rocket ship, Flash and Zarkov prepare to jump.

They jump.

They land safely.

They sneak in down a handy ladder.

Unaware that Ming is waiting for them. He’s hiding again. How cute.

Zarkov is as happy as a pig in shit – he’s got chemicals to play with.

It doesn’t last – they haven’t seen any guards and the pessimistic doctor is worried.

Flash has a play with a televiser but doesn’t get any joy. Then it springs into life and shows him exactly what he was looking for. He’s do dumb he doesn’t realise how suspicious that is. Either that or the visual effects guy missed his cue.

Ming explains to Azura that he’s laid the perfect trap. When Zarkov mixes the chemicals together…. he doesn’t actually explain what will happen next but we get the idea it will be something merciless.

True to form, the mixture begins to bubble. Zarkov is appalled.

He tosses his flask across the laboratory…

…there is a big bang and/or flash…

…and they die.

Next week sounds nicely generic.