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Far be it from me to second guess the action but there is no way Copperhead Bob could survive that inferno. Normally I’m all optimistic and shit – the hero will always survive, that’s my mantra – but Bob is toast. No one could be dumped in such a predicament and survive. His only hope might lie in a sudden outbreak of industrial action which immobilises evil across Capitol City. But that would never happen.
Or could it? Lois is taking the news of Bob’s incineration well.
She explains that Dr Satan phoned her to taunt her about his getting the wrong end of the stick. Speed comforts her by reminding her that his tie isn’t straight so they’re all suffering on this of all days. The phone rings – is it Doctor Satan? Is he going to scrunch Bob’s ashes in his evil hand as she listens on helplessly?
Why it’s…
…Copperhead Bob! He’s calling from heaven. Lois almost looks cute when she gasps "It’s the Copperhead!" in a giggly girlish way.
Bob gives us an explanation of how he escaped. He uses the medium of flashback. First we have Bob in the box.
Then we have Bob getting out of the box.
Bob is now out of the box.
And Bob putting some handy sacks of something in the box in his place. It’s like the final reel of Jonathan Creek – all the little things fitting together in such a clever way that you never saw it coming until now. Bob climbed out of the box. The clues were all there.
To tie up the loose ends, Bob then ran away.
And hid.
"Nothing can stand in your way now, Doctor Satan" says a smarmy lacky who hasn’t realised he’ll be dead or in jail within the next fourteen minutes.
Doctor Satan says he would be happy for the authorities to find this base and that he has no further need for Professor Scott. This man is evil.
Bob now faces a choice – stay at this base and watch Doctor Satan or jump aboard the truck which is going to dispose of Professor Scott. He chooses the most uncomfortable version of the latter.
He sneaks into the house where they are holding Professor Scott. I hadn’t realised until now how high the Copperhead wore his trousers.
Bob attacks a guard. A fight doesn’t break out because Bob hits him from behind.
"I’m not obeying any more orders" snaps Scott. "You’ll obey his last order" says the henchman. Quality dialogue.
The man is about to shoot the Prof when he himself takes one in the back. It’s the Copperhead!
A fight breaks out.
Bob wins.
Bob says that Dr Satan is being taken care of – the DA’s men are on their way. Scott warns him that the house is a death trap and that unless the DA’s men know their way around, they will be crunched, mangled, shot, trapped, squashed, broken and twisted at every turn. Bob is appalled.
Here come the fuzz.
They’ve brought friends with them. How nice.
Doctor Satan activates his death traps.
A light lights up to let him know where the DA’s men are. You’ll note that the East Room is in the middle of the house. That makes no sense.
He has big buttons to press. It’s like job satisfaction but better.
Meanwhile, the Copperhead is driving while having what looks like a mental breakdown. Maybe he’s allergic to wool.
Doctor Satan’s first death trap is some sliding panels which cover the doors. His second is a net which falls from the ceiling. Not exactly death traps so far. I’m sure he has some better japes up his sleeves.
Oooh – he’s pleased with himself over the hilarious net joke.
Smoke! A really small pop of an explosion and some smoke.
He leaves. That’s it – that’s Doctor Satan’s house of horrors. A bit of darkness, a couple of pops, some dry ice and a net. He’s officially become crap. He was only unofficially crap before.
He has Lois, Speed and two people we’ve never met before and fundamentally don’t care about tied up in a room. Doctor Satan says his robot will "give you all a final, deadly embrace". He sends his men to the control room. He had to make things complicated didn’t he.
I bet it bites him on the ass. You just wait. Doctor Satan leaves them to the robot and walked jauntily away. Little does he know what might be round the corner.
The game is up. Doctor Satan is appalled.
Lois is in imminent danger but now we get a pivotal moment in the serial. Bob magically transforms in front of the professor for no reason at all.
Professor Scott – one astonished man.
Bob puts his mask over Doctor Satan’s head. Cunning.
The robot – as slow as the gas board – is still lumbering towards Lois. She’s running out of facial expressions.
Five chairs – you’ll notice that there are five chairs – because two of Doctor Satan’s henchmen have put the Copperhead in with the rest of the soon-to-be-squashed.
A scream. Again, there aren’t any frames where it doesn’t look as if she’s incredibly happy.
But happily, these two are operating the robot and they spot the faux-Copperhead.
The robot grabs Doctor Satan. His petard soon hoists him.
Bob and Scott find the control room and a fight breaks out.
Doctor Satan removes his mask but it is too late – there is no one at the controls.
The robot and Doctor Satan crash through the French windows.
It’s a long way down.
Scott smashes the robot control unit. A little too well actually as we can see it is just an empty wooden desk.
Doctor Satan RIP.
The happy final act – Speed asks who the Copperhead was. Scott picks up the mask and hands it to Bob. Lois and Speed are astonished.
Bob explains about his father from chapter one and asks that when Lois and Speed write up the story of Doctor Satan they explain that the Copperhead – senior or junior – were good men fighting crime, not lawbreakers hell bent on anarchy and personal gain. She is happy to do so.
A happy ending.
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