The War Games
“The Long Banging Story”, “The
Final Doctor Who Story Ever”, “Rubber Up People”
“The One Where They Say
Goodbye To Pictures Made Up of Two Colors That We're No Longer Allowed To
Say” (USA), “Doktor Von Wer Und Der Zehn Episoden”
(Indonesia)
Doctor Who meets some men
who like fighting and wearing rubber
*** - It’s long, momentous,
features lots of explosive moments, builds up slowly and once its over you
know you’ll never be quite the same again
Terrance Dicks “The novel will
be longer than usual”
Target “No it won’t”
"For such a little woman, your
pants are too big"
Wendy Padbury lost her skirt
in front of a vicar yet again during the making of this story.
Fraser “Tupperware” Hines and
Noel “The Mole Man” Coleman had a fight during rehearsals of part two.
Fraser believed that Greco Roman grappling was the superior fighting
discipline while Noel argued that Queensbury Rules were best. In the end,
Wendy Padbury put on her Kendo gear and bashed them both silly with her
big stick.
Ten kinky rubber uniforms were
supplied from the wardrobe department but only three were returned. Two
are listed as having “perished” while the other five simply vanished.
Unconfirmed reports indicate they might have been seen for sale in a
specialist magazine some time in 1970.
Dinner with Bernard Horsefall
regularly sells for up to one hundred thousand euros on eBay. If you pay
by credit card, he throws in his impression of Halle Berry for no extra
charge.
The War Chief is only the
fourth Time Lord to appear in the series – after The Doctor, The Monk and
Milo Clancy.
As this was the final story in
the season, the production team could afford to use genuine time machines
during the making of this serial.
Fraser Hines lost his kilt in
front of a bishop during rehearsals for part nine. He deliberately
arranged this so he could upstage Wendy “Paddles” Padbury and her clutch
of vicars.
Si Hunt
The
Reduced War Games
"Every few years the Firkinside Sealed
Knot society stages a re-enactment of the Battle of Bendaton - one of the
most interesting battles of the Civil War. It was an unusual spectacle as
it was fought between two confused Royalist armies, both of whom had
visited Bendaton's barber Mr Nakashitamura. Sadly, Mr Nakashitamura
didn't speak much English and gave them sensible hair cuts instead of
their grandiose regal curls. I was put in charge of arranging everything
and thought it might be especially witty to invite James Bree to open
festivities. I welcomed Mr Bree to the specially constructed podium and he
surveyed the battleground before him. "Why are there eleven people on one
side and only one on the other?" he asked with the wishy washy liberalism
I've come to expect from actors. "Don't be pathetically stupid" I said,
maintaining my wit in the face of ignorance, "I've weighed both sides and
with Ian Devine verses myself, Wicks, Grantham, Mr Wetfinger, Mr Knockers,
Nigel Gusset, Miss Bobbins, Mrs Gusset, Mr Jones, Mr Cunthleigh and my
brother Donald Brent we have two perfectly evenly matched armies." He
looked at Ian Devine's wobbling face (I'm sure his knees were knocking
under his smock and causing ripples) and shrugged. "I don't care - I'm
only here for the fifty quid." Now it was my turn to look shocked. "Pence,
surely" I replied. He sighed, picked up a nearby pike and swung it at my
chest. Luckily, at the last moment, a freak gust of wind must've diverted
it as it missed my rented armour plating and merely broke my jaw."
 
 
 
Satire - the real War Lord
A man walking round and exposing the lies of
warfare. What a copycat...
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