The Smugglers

"Doctor Who and the Pirates Episode I", "Yo ho ho and a bottle of unnamed commercially available pop"

"The One Without the Caribbean" (USA)

Doctor Who does something with some smugglers who want to find some treasure and read poetry

*** - William Hartnell is like the anti-Peter Pan as he was born an old man and remained one until becoming Patrick Troughton. But this week he got Captain Hook to join in.

"Shah-shiver my tinders… timbers my dear Pen and Bolly" (Billy fluff)

"My dear sir, I'm sure you can quickly see through any pants of mine"

This story won the prestigious Golden Radish at the Chechnyan Television Festival, 1987

If you play the second CD backwards, you can hear Mark Ayres telling you to bow down and worship the Restoration Team as your new Gods.

The story was based on real events and only the names of the Time Travellers have been changed to protect Jeffrey Archer and his young companions. Oops – what a give-away…

The director originally assigned this production was wounded when his goldfish exploded. His replacement fell down a manhole while scouting locations. The third choice woke up one morning and couldn’t remember anything and the fourth developed a rare condition where he would trip over anything that got in his way. This led to the serial having a reputation for bad luck which was only erased when the burning of the video tape passed by without fatalities.

Si Hunt

"Little is known by the proles about Story CC. They rather endearingly call it a "lost" story which is so funny that Ian Devine and I often laugh until our trousers are forced open by the sheer force of mirth. If anyone tells you any other reason why our trousers became opened they are spreading lies because they are jealous of my stature (and to a much lesser degree jealous of Ian Devine's reputation). One peasant once mentioned to an acquaintance that the rhyme quoted in part one was different to the one read in part three. He seemed to think this was a bad thing. "Don't be pathetically stupid" I quipped when I'd taken off my Snoop-Spy 3000™ headphones and disconnected it from my portable battery pack. "That line fluff was an absolute godsend. I must've spent over two hundred hours studying contemporary documentation in order to prove definitively, one way or the other, whether the error was in fact a live mistake or if it had been a change in the script over the intervening weeks. My monograph on the subject was extremely well received in certain specialist circles which would not invite you pair of work shy h-o-m-o-s-e-x-u-a-l-s to join as you are both beneath contempt. Now, if you would stop pestering me, I will get back to my researches. Good day" and I marched back to my expensive equipment and small glass of sherry safe in the knowledge that I am a good person and choose to prove it beyond reasonable doubt on a regular basis."

Smugglers Cove... miniature golf (with alligators)

Judge for yourself, is this the ONLY place in Newquay or do they lie?