Dear Diary,

The man John didn't take my threat seriously.

"Dammit, Butch, I'm a mineralogist not a bright green young rookie. You can't frighten me with empty threats and hollow rhetoric."

"I'm in deadly earnest, John" I insisted. "I need give you one verbal warning and one written warning before I am legally able to terminate your contract of employment."

"Captain Maitland - you can't fire John" blubbed Carol Richmond, my co-astronaut.

"I can and I will if necessary" I said firmly. "Should the need arise" I added for extra conviction.

"Dammit, Butch, give me every warning under the sun - I'm a mineralogist not a man of paper. I won't bend and I won't break."

"In that case you leave me no alternative. John Manly - you are hereby issued with a verbal warning."

"Dammit, Butch, I accept it."

"Will you now agree to abide by employee committee decisions?"

"I will not, dammit."

"Then I have no alternative" I picked up a piece of paper and wrote out a formal written warning. I handed it to him and he tore it to shreds before my startled eyes. Carol Richmond looked at me with horror on her face.

"Please, Captain Maitland..." she sobbed. I verbally pushed her aside.

"John Manly - I hereby give you notice that you are no longer a member of INNER."

"Dammit, Butch, I'm a mineralogist not a company man. It doesn't matter two hoots what badge I wear as long as I'm amongst minerals I'm as happy as a pig in sediment."

As I sit here considering the events of the last hour I realise that my recruitment campaign has not been a success thus far. Our attempts to increase the crew from three to more than three has left us with only two full time INNER employees.

Dear Diary,

The man John and I have just been through an exhausting half hour as we put the finishing touches to his consultancy agreement. Essentially it means that he will be the Pioneer’s mineralogist but he won’t be working for us. He will continue to wear the INNER uniform as he doesn’t appear to have any other clothes but his badge will mean nothing and he won’t be expected to maintain the high standards of professional appearance that the rest of the INNER personnel are held to. He will also be entitled to keep all minerals that he discovers but that INNER will be paid a percentage for carriage, a rental fee for the man John’s cabin, a smaller rental fee for the use of his uniform and it allows for staged payments in the event of a significant find. I am pleased that we have come to a sensible understanding like the adults that we are.

Dear Diary,

A most remarkable thing has happened. Carol Richmond and I were on the bridge when a rumbling noise was clearly audible. At first I thought Carol was simply hungry but the whooshing wind suggested otherwise.

"Captain Maitland, there is no need to be afraid" she said. I assured her I was in full control of the situation but even I had to gasp when a large humanoid faded into being about a foot above the deck.

"Who are you?" I asked.

"Who am I addressing?" he demanded.

"I am Captain Maitland and this is my co-astronaut, Carol Richmond. This is the INNER ship SS Pioneer. I repeat my earlier question – who are you?"

"I am Potternob – the space genie" he boomed. "I am here to grant you three wishes."

"Why would anyone…" began Carol but I silenced her because negotiations are a man’s job.

"That’s very kind of you" I began. "For my first wish I would like ten more wishes."

"Very droll" said Potternob. "That doesn’t count – genies are on budgets too you know."

"Very well, we will consider what you have said and give you our answer soon."

I have convened an emergency staff meeting to discuss our options. It’s due to start in five minutes so you’ll have to excuse me – I have coffee and biscuits to lay out and if I don’t ask her now, Carol won’t have time to do it before the others arrive.

Minutes of the SS Pioneer Staff Meeting

Date : the 28th Century

Present : Captain Maitland, Carol Richmond, Fingers and the consultant John

Apologies : none

Agenda

1. Minutes of the last meeting.

2. The space genie, Potternob – who is he, how did he get here, what does he want?

3. Three wishes

4. Any other business.

Minutes

1. All outstanding matters have been dealt with. A copy of the minutes has been signed by all those who sent their apologies.

2. We have no idea.

ACTION POINT – Working group to be set up to find out more about Potternob the genie.

3. Who is to get a share of the three wishes? TCJ was voted the odd man out as he is no longer a member of the crew.

ACTION POINT – CM, F and CR to each get one wish.

4. AOB – TCJ wished it to be put on record that he is "a freelance mineralogist, dammit, not some kind of invisible puppy that will let itself be kicked around and ignored"

Next meeting –

Chair – Captain Maitland

Minutes – Fingers

Dear Diary,

We returned to the bridge where Potternob was sitting cross legged on the leisure table.

"We have come to a decision" I told him.

"Who wishes to make their wish first?" asked the genie. I had already decided to go last so I could see what the others asked for and avoid wasting my wish on anything where there might be overlap.

"Fingers" I said.

"I am content" he said.

"Come on, little fellow" said Potternob, "there must be something you want."

"Well, I would like to know how I can build a giant robot to aid the crew with some of the more dangerous and onerous duties."

"Ali-ka-shazam" cried Potternob and a ball of smoke puffed up around Fingers. His eyes appeared to widen even though his kind do not have eye lids.

"I have it" he squealed excitedly. He rushed off to his laboratory to get down to work.

"Who is next?" asked Potternob. I pointed to Carol Richmond.

"Well… since John and I are going to get married when we get back to the Earth I think I’d like a proper engagement ring to be going on with."

"Ali-ka-shazam" cried Potternob. There was another puff of smoke and a ring jerked into existence on Carol’s finger.

"It’s beautiful" she whimpered effeminately.

"And now you, great and noble leader" said Potternob.

"I have a space craft, a loyal crew and a whole universe to explore" I said patriotically. "There is nothing more I could possibly want."

"Really?" asked Potternob.

"Oh, well, if you insist, I’d like…" I continued.

"Dammit, Butch, I’m a freelance mineralogist not a child with my face pressed against the window. I won’t be shunted to one side when important things are going on" shouted John as he forced open the bridge door.

"I wish you’d leave us alone" I snapped, the toll of making such an important decision had frayed my self control.

"Ali-ka-shazam" cried Potternob and the consultant John disappeared in a puff of smoke.