Invasion of Time

Tom's comedic asides are one of the true joys of mid-late seventies Doctor Who, and the moments where he crosses the forbidden line and goes "too far" (the oft-mentioned but unforgettable scene in "Nightmare of Eden" for example) are notable for their scarcity. It's certainly true that Tom can be overwhelming to watch at times, and "The Invasion of Time" probably marks the last time until JNT took over that the story itself wasn't trampled underfoot by the great man's attempts to stage a one-Time Lord comedy show. Ironic, really, given that "The Invasion of Time" is a story about the Doctor.

It is, however, also a shoddy and near-unwatchable mess, thanks to some appalling production values and utterly stinking music. We won't dwell on these things further; suffice to say that the moments of humour used to work so much better given some genuine dramatic tension for them to dissolve. "Image of the Fendahl" is a good example. In "Invasion of Time", Tom's witticisms (they may be his, or the result of barmy-from-overworked typing fingers) are as good as ever. In one of the later parts (please don't make me look up which; agreeing to watch "The Invasion of Time" is a commitment of marriage-sized proportions) he claims to Leela that he "knows this ship like the back of my hand". She glares at him, noting that he's indicating the front of his hand instead, and slowly turns it over. It's very funny on screen, trust me. Yet take away the jokes, and all you are left with are the Time Lord's 'Amber Alert' glowing billiard balls and a chaotic amount of running about. Still, it's better to be funny than dull.

Some time ago, we took a look at ten occasions when Doctor Who was, against its own and the fans better judgment, not as funny as it thought it was. I now feel duty bound to re-address the balance, and so here present ten bits of Doctor Who which I (and, again, it's all just opinion) consider to be overlooked, intelligently funny and worthy of appraisal.

1. The "Fang Rock" Slap

There's a great bit of visual comedy in "Horror of Fang Rock". Okay, the story is overflowing with it, and it works particularly well because the adventure is otherwise taken so seriously (Tom gives his darkest performance). Most of the funniest moments centre around Leela, with one mis-fire (the odd moment where she tells the Doctor "you...are... a Time Lord" and then they look at each other and the scene finishes, as if needing a punch line). The best example of visual humour comes just after the Doctor announces, with a perfect mix of curiosity and matter-of-factness, that "Lord Palmerdale has fallen from the lamp gallery!". Abigail screams hysterically, to which Leela turns and slaps her, and everyone else just gets on with the scene.

2. Changing Faces in "The Mind Robber"

The Doctor choosing a wrong face for Jamie in "The Mind Robber" is funny, but only when pointed out by Zoë. Troughton's best comedy moments weren't pre-"Evil of the Daleks" when he dressed up in drag or adopted silly accents. They came after he'd been sworn in as the slightly icy, mysterious little man who vowed to fight "evil corners of the Universe" in "The Moonbase". The fact that he can then make silly mistakes like getting the intelligence test wrong in "The Krotons", or giving Jamie the wrong face brings much light relief, especially when Zoë susses him out. "You did this before... and you got it wrong!" she says. A parallel can be drawn when Sylvester McCoy's similarly brooding Season 26 Doctor drops a brick on his foot in "The Curse of Fenric". Except, of course, being the late eighties, this is just silly.

3. Hartnell in "The Three Doctors".

"The Three Doctors" is a story which isn't funny where it thinks it is. But when someone decided that, rather than send up the stumbling, ailing actor as must have been tempting, the Hartnell Doctor should instead show up his "replacements", some genuinely warm and funny moments result. Aside from calling them "the Dandy and the Clown" as if reading from "The Doctor Who Monster Book", Hartnell gets to demand why they haven't "done anything" and chuckle away to himself because they are trapped in the TARDIS. It's not just the amazingly in-character and charming performance that makes it a delight to cheer along with him as he brings the more assured performances of Pertwee and Troughton down to size, it's the skilfully written lines he's given as well.

4. K9

No-one seems to find K9 funny. Not as funny as the Sutekh Hand or things that are willy shaped anyway. K9 always worked best when he was smug, such as in "The Androids of Tara" when he curtly reminds the Doctor to start the Chess clock. Then there's the bit in "The Sunmakers" when he has to be deceived lest he thinks he's getting a "W-A-L-K"! ("I'll be good!"). And what about "come on K9, put your leads on!". Or when he is left floating in the middle of a lake at the end of "The Androids of Tara", utterly humiliated. Am I really the only one to find this laugh-out-loud funny? Yes, it seems that I am.

5. Beatrix Lehmann in "Stones of Blood".

But of course. Whether it be struggling through a scene in Part 1 that seems to go on forever (and Tom seemingly guiding her through it by the power of sheer will alone) or cleaning her ear out with a screwdriver while delivering dialogue, or simply being of the belief that substituting "oompity boompity" for real lines when you can't remember them will see you through, this is possibly a unique performance in the history of television. She managed to upstage Tom Baker anyway, that's got to be worth something.

6. "Be careful I don't slosh you with it!"

Moment of supreme joy and postmodernism in "The Green Death" when supposedly butch soldier Yates slips effortlessly into his real life mincing-old-queen persona and adlibs a curt "I like your handbag!" to Jon Pertwee. Who's, naturally, dressed up in drag. If this scene didn't exist, no-one would believe it actually happened.

7. The Old Shoes Gag ("You could have leant her hers")

Laughing at Hartnell fluffs is very old hat, which is why they haven't been included here. But his big "Keys of Marinus" moment is always worthy of any top 10, not so much for the bungled punch line, but for the mounting build-up to it. When the pay-off comes, everyone has to laugh anyway and you wonder if the old boy actually thought he'd got it right. Did he apologise afterwards? A friend of mine once told a joke in a pub and messed up the end. Nobody laughed. Thank goodness for television.

8. Sylvester McCoy

Should we continue to include moments when Doctor Who was funny because it was a bit rubbish? Have I missed the point of this whole exercise in including one of Doctor Who's biggest comedy assets? Probably, but what the heck. He makes me laugh. Chuck in the whole of "Battlefield" for good measure - "HACE!", "Yes, remember Bayldon and my mighty arse!", "Go! Before! I unleash... a terrible SOMETHING on you!". Take your pick. Yes, it's a low shot but it's funny.

9. "The Invasion of Time"

Certainly we don't ever chuckle at the prospect of watching this cheap old runaround, with its giant red inflatable Time Lord Cushions or Derek Deadman's wonky Sontaran mask or those bloody Amber Alert bulbs. But the thing about Tom's madcap humour is, even though it occasionally backfired, it was frequently very good. In fact, all thing's considered, the man maybe a better comedy performer than serious actor. "The Invasion of Time" marks the start of the humour taking over, but it also coincided with a lamentable drop in production values and certain less memorable scripts. It's just about the best thing in "The Invasion of Time", talking directly to camera and all, so for that we should be thankful.

If you've got a moment, there's also a great exchange between the Doctor and Leela in "Image of the Fendahl":

"Doctor I do not like the way you keep talking about my ancestors!"

"I like your new dress."

"Thank you."

"It's a pleasure."

10. Insert Your Own

You might think I've left my tenth choice vacant because I could only think of nine things. You'll never know if you are right, because all I'm going to say is that you may not have found any of the above amusing at all. As well as the art of comedy often being in the delivery, everyone has things they find funny in Doctor Who for different reasons. As in any form of humour, some people connect with more obvious jokes, some favour subtler stabs at making them laugh; there's nothing wrong with either case. But I feel sure you have laughed not only at, but with Doctor Who on quite a few occasions, because it's a show that didn't often take itself completely seriously. Didn't the Doctor once say that the worst thing in life was to be without a sense of humour? I might have made that up, but in any case, it would be the sort of thing he might have said. Half-jokingly, of course.