The League of Gentlemen – Ten Days in Royston Vasey (part one)

I’d never been a fan of what I shall, for the most part in this little missive, refer to as “the LoG” to save your, my and (with an astronomical amount of luck) Kenneth Kendall’s precious time. I had seen much of their output and sat through it with a resigned “it’s not funny” face and sigh. Why then did I watch it? I guess because it was on. I’ve watched a lot of things in my short life and a lot of those have failed to cut anything like the mustard. Equally I have taped a lot of things I know I like for later viewing and then not got round to watching. These days I don’t really watch telly and let TiVo do it for me. You could, if so inclined at this point, take down your copy of “Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency” by Douglas Adams and read the section on video recorders and electric monks. The man was right, he just got the brand name wrong.

For the last few weeks I’d had a nagging feeling that I wanted something new to watch. Some new comedy series to watch and appreciate. Having devoured Chris Morris’s JAM I was in the mood for something, shall we say, off beat. I looked at Bo Selecta on the shelves of WHSmith. I’d never seen it. Indeed, aside from the ad bumpers during my darling Sue’s starring role in Celebrity Big Brother II, I’d no idea of the show’s existence. It was probably a Friday Night Comedy. Capitalised because, since the dawn of time, Friday night has been the night when – if in – I’ve watched WWF/WWE Raw. Sometimes keenly, of late more reluctantly. But ever since cable television was installed on 19th September 1997 I have viewed this weekly two hour. So Friday Night Comedy shows have tended to pass me by unless they were of the HIGNFY flavour.

I could never bring myself to buy it. Then came a week last Thursday when I happened across Woolworths. Woolies, as a rule, have crap sales. As a shop with an identity crisis, their DVD department never seems to get much attention. In my local branch it is shockingly arranged and bits of it keep disappearing under the weight of mobile phone gadgets and furry animals. On this occasion though they had a 3-for-£25 offer and within the massed ranks of forgettable Hollywood films and copies of the should-be-better Blackadder DVDs they had series one of the LoG. And series two. To show how unsure I was, I only got series one. I made up my threesome with The Office and Donnie Darko (neither of which have yet left their boxes owing to the success of the LoG).

Let us take a moment to slag off Woolworths’ habit of keeping empty boxes on the shelves and the discs in shitty cardboard sleeves. Amongst other issues, this practice adds ten minutes to any purchase (which it did and then some this time as someone had put two discs in the shitty cardboard sleeve and the girl was unsure whether it was a double disc set or not – help was called for and eventually the three of them decided to look at the box and concluded that it was probably designed for one occupant only). It also results in discs which are scratched and which have the finger prints of their various staff members on them. I am not a Home Entertainment Purist who keeps their DVDs in air tight storage to keep them pristine. I have been known to leave discs in my player over night, I have been known to put DVDs down on surfaces while I hunt round for the box. Dammit I don’t even have my discs in alphabetical order. But I would prefer that the disc and the box are not separated between the factory and my home by people who work at Woolworths.

It is amazing the difference that being able to watch something when you want to rather than when a scheduler tells you to can make. Sitting down and actually watching the LoG rather than rushing for a tape at 9.29 (or whenever) and managing to start the recording three seconds into the opening of the episode is highly recommended. Also highly recommended is watching it one episode at a time and then rewatching shortly afterwards with the DVD commentary on. The lads (if I can sink to Ron Atkinson speak for a second) are informative and amusing. They give the listener a mixture of background on the characters and the sketches (most of which had been performed on stage in the past), technical details about filming, makeup and visual effects and pointing out details within the episodes which either mattered before or will matter later. They built up a real community in Royston Vasey which the presence of other characters in the background of sketches helps to convey.

Mention of them performing the material on stage reminds me of the Marx Brothers. They would take film scripts and perform the sketches in Vaudeville for weeks or even months until they had fine tuned the routines. This helped to give their films the frenetic and unceasing (at least until they started adding looooong musical distractions) pace for which they are famous. The LoG were stage performers for many years and their familiarity with the sketches really pays off. They know the characters so well (as displayed on the commentary where even the most minor person has a name and a background) that they have a depth which goes far beyond the one line creations of the Fast Show. Because the LoG used to perform without make up or costume they have paid particular attention to the voices. On stage they would wear dinner jackets and each character was identified by one prop – be it a pair of glasses or a hastily donned wig – and the voice. They moved to radio where they didn’t even have the luxury of a prop. The vocal ranges of all the LoG are to be applauded. For the most part they avoid “silly voices” and instead give each person a voice which is at least close to believable. Exaggerated only so far as not to upstage the make up, costume and situation. It certainly doesn’t sound like just three people voicing everyone.

The make up too is superb. The LoG are three fairly distinct looking chaps. You have Mark Gatiss who has a tall face, long nose and an effeminate visage. You have Steve Pemberton who has a round face with a cleft chin and you have Reece Shearsmith who is the pretty boy of the three with his almost girlish face and black hair. Make up and wigs transform them into what documentary narrator Griff Rhys Jones tells us is over sixty characters. They said on the DVD that they chose not to use full prosthetic faces because it distracts from the performance. This appears to be true throughout – they have little bits added but certainly nothing that could be pealed off in true Doctor Who style to reveal a different face beneath.

Next time I might actually talk about the shows themselves – the characters, the story lines, the style of humour and the speed with which it became a cult hit. But at least I have managed to write over a thousand words about the LoG without ever sinking to one of their catch phrases.

What?

You’re disappointed?

Oh dash it.

If you insist.

This is a local column for local people.

There – satisfied?

Hmph.

25th January 2004