Katy III - Return of the Pervs

I swore I wouldn’t and it would be a lie if I said there had been a swelling of public support (there may well have been swelling involved but it was not mine and it was not supporting anything) but I have returned for the final (possibly) time to the perverted world of the Katy Hill message board. A haven for virgins who can type (badly) with just their left hand.

We start as we mean to go on with this poetic burst from "sexy katy".

i want to shag the fuck out of katy hill. i want to stick my cock up her big pussy, lick those fucking sexy gorgeous legs. i watch her every saturday morning and masterbate over her. i get pics from the internet, and zoom onto her legs, and masterbate like crazy. i fucking love katy hill!!!

A somewhat crude missive which, not being someone especially attracted to the bony charms of shiny legs, I fail to empathise with. As for his (I assume it’s a him) flattering description of her genitals, one can only assume size it relative and it would only appear to be big when compared to the cocktail stick he would be slipping into it.

But that post is pure and lyrical sanity compared to the reply from "macca".

Babe, i want to get my foot long and shove it inside her warm, moist oven until i cum my red hot love juice all up her fanny.

I’m no statistician but men with twelve inch penises are generally too busy having lots of the actual sex, often for money, to post sub-pornographic filth on sad message boards. Call me cynical but this guy has obviously read one too many (ie one) copy of Parade magazine and thought "that lookz well easi".

As if posting inane sleaze wasn’t bad enough, "dgames" goes one further with this message header.

i would love to buttfuck that beyatch

But click on the message and you get…

but till then click my links

http://dansonlinegames.tripod.com

voilent games site
http://bashbob.tripod.com

I think that is what’s known as a double whammy.

A tale of woe next from "Charlie" who demonstrates that the internet is mainly used by two groups of people – those selling pornography and those wanting to get it for free.

A few months ago one of my mates put a fake topless pic of Katy on his site and the ammount of mail he got wanting to know if there were any more resulted in BT closing him down for fucking up their nice system.

Readers of my first column on this subject will recall that someone purporting to be Katy’s husband popped up to rebuke the people lusting after his wife. Since then there has been another reply to his message of condemnation.

If you really are her husband then a) why are you getting so worried about us 'assholes', and b) why do you feel you have to justify you are on to a good thing by describing your (obviously not so great) sex life to the world?

you are one sad, insecure guy.
I pity you.

He makes a good point – how could a woman’s husband POSSIBLY call someone an asshole for filling a message board with disgusting fantasies about his wife? The husband, were he genuine (about which the replier seems in some doubt), is clearly the one at fault here and not the people who posted the following. It’s the worst stuff on the board and those of a sensitive disposition shouldn’t read on.

"john" writes in my fantasy katy you are naked on your knees under a huge stallion, playing with it's massive cock. you stroke and lick it before you take it in your mouth and suck. smiling at the camera you then bend over and push the horse's cock into your pussy. it stretches you and you scream but you luv it and push back until it fills you up. you rock back and forth and the horse thrusts into you until you cum and it floods your pussy with spunk. it cums so much the spunk runs out down your perfect thighs.

To which "sobi" feels compelled to add Then Katy you hold the massive stallion's cock in your hand and you start wanking it, making your hands all covered in the animals cum and rub your hand on your face so that all the cum is covering your slutty face. You then insert the cock into your mouth and try to suck it but it too wide so you start to wank him off using your cum covered legs and then he cum you open your mouth and fill your tummy with the nasty animal cum. You then sit in the sun trying to sunbath with the mask on your face mae of the stallions cum.

You SLUT Katy You but we love you.

Yes indeed – nothing suggests the pureness of adoration like bestial pornography. Such people should be shot through each testicle and then fisted by a big man wearing hedgehog skin gloves.

But before you start thinking that this obsessive and rather sticky fury of masturbatory juices is aimed solely at Katy Hill, another BP lovely gets the treatment.

Liz Barker is the fittest wench ever to present BP.
She acts giggly and lost cos she hasn't had a proper servicing yet.
It'd be fun to see if she still talks posh with a dick in her mouth.

I doubt even Katy Hill could talk posh with a dick in her mouth and, by the sound of this message board, she’s obviously had an awful lot of practice. Which of course she probably hasn’t. What makes this board so vile and yet so compelling is the incongruity of it. If it were crap being posted about someone tarty like, well, just about every other presentrix on TV then it would be easier to understand. But Katy Hill always seemed that bit more wholesome than all the rest. I guess these perverted weasels get off on someone unobtainable but have yet to twig that "unobtainable" covers every single woman on the planet and no matter how much shit they make up, Katy could never come down to their squalid level.

I think Katy should do what Jay and Silent Bob did at the end of J&SB Strike Back. Who wouldn’t tune in for a Christmas Special in which Katy goes round the country armed with a list of all those who took part in this sleazy business and kicks the shit out of each and everyone one of them. But alas those sad fuckers would probably enjoy it.