10th May

I had an idea for a new thing the other day. Actually, if I'm honest, I don't know - really - whether I had this idea for the first time on Thursday or if it had been bubbling away in my brain for months. I really can't remember. Anyway, I'd made a bit of a tentative start on Thursday before the floodgates opened. I got home from work yesterday and started writing. Four hours later I'd written six thousand words and was feeling rather pleased with it. It is a really pointless idea and I may never do anything with it but for someone as lazy as I've become over the past few years, six thousand words is not a bad evening's work. And I only stopped because my eyes are still rather dry and they were telling me enough was enough.

~~~~~

The same project hasn't been going quite as well today. I've lost confidence in it already. Eight and a half thousand words and I've lost faith in it. I know I'm in the bit I thought would be a problem but I had a kind of woolly faith I'd get through it. Maybe I'm just tired. Or maybe it really was a bad idea after all.

~~~~~

I was amused to read Sky moaning because ITV are going to make ITV-HD exclusive to the new Freesat platform. Wah wah wah, said Sky, this isn't fair. The gist of their argument is that ITV should be forced to make their HD services available to all. Which is terribly noble of Sky and is a principle I entirely endorse. Where Sky's moral high ground starts to crumble is their refusal to let Virgin Media have access to any of their HD services. No Sky Sports HD, no Sky One HD, no nothing HD. So its fine for Sky to keep content exclusive to their platform but not for ITV to do the same. Sky must get up every day from their cosy corporate bed and thank their lucky stars that they are controlling a society of morons unable to hold two thoughts in their heads at the same time or more people would start to realise that something smells slightly rodenty whenever Sky open their high definition mouths.

~~~~~

Father's television is driving me mad. It claims to be HD ready but the manual doesn't say anything about HD. It has an HDMI socket but it is the most absurdly placed socket I have ever seen. Or rather not seen because it is invisible unless you are two inches tall, walk up to the back of the telly and look up. It baffles me anyway because I don't see the point of a 26 inch HD TV because you're never going to notice the difference. But he's not allowed a bigger set because it would dominate the room. Or something more girlie than I can understand. And he's like me - he has a V+ box - so there is only one HD channel and that's not a proper channel. But every so often he'll ask me why he can't get HD. I've told him I've connected it all up, twiddled all the right settings and it just flat out refuses to work. The other evening he made a point of asking whether I'd used a high definition lead. My guess is he'd phoned Toshiba or Comet and they'd run through page one of their script with him. Today I had another go - I took round an HDMI lead which I know works - because the fault was with the telly, the V+ box or the cable - and did all the same things I'd done before. No joy. We can safely rule out a defective lead. It's one of those problems which doesn't need fixing but I have to fix it. My money is on the television being at fault - there are some weasel words in the manual which say it "might not work" with all HDMI equipment. It's a shame because I quite like it as a television. It's too small, obviously, but I'd been thinking about getting a larger version. Now I'm left thinking it is more trouble than its worth.

~~~~~

And do you know how many people in the last four days have mentioned the fact that I'm no longer wearing glasses? One. One single person who didn't know in advance that I was being done. If you'd asked me in advance who that person would be, I would've guessed correctly.

7th May

When you come to the end of a reasonably big project you know you can look forward to one of three things. (a) absolutely nothing, (b) vouchers which are almost as good as proper money or (c) a project meal at a local eatery. I was sure that the project which has just finished would be a (b). Though our receiving CERTIFICATES OF EXCELLENCE~! from the project manager a few weeks ago made me wonder if that was it and an (a) was heading our way. We had the project closure meeting this afternoon and it was notable only for the guy mentioned here arriving late, shushing himself as he crept in and then trying to mount a chair with arms sideways. Without pulling it from under the table. The last shush had barely left his lips when he tried, using nothing more than a pivot of the hips, to slide over, under and in. It didn't work. The meeting ground to a halt as we watched him struggle with his chair. Dear lord, he was wearing black jeans, hitched up to his chest with what can only be described as a visible bulge as he did so. And then came the news that this was a (b) project. We're all going to a local pub next week for food. I hope he comes - some unintentional comedy from him and an evening of the downstairs IT men slagging off the upstairs IT men will make up for a menu which had thirteen "main courses" and not one of them was anything less than drenched in the blood of a fellow creature. Even the salads - of which there were five - were tainted. Menus suck.

~~~~~

So I'm glad its this Wednesday and not last Wednesday. I went back to the opticians this evening to get sign off (I've spent too long on projects when I instinctively say "sign off" instead of "the all clear" or "a final check up"). I got it on my right eye but my left had a higher dose of anti-inflammatory drops and she thought it best to reduce the dose day by day rather than go cold tofurky. But that's it for mandatory drops - which is good as I had to nip to the loo eleven times today to put drops in. This is no regime for weaklings. I don't have to sleep in goggle any more either. Now all I need is for the haze which surrounds strong lights to go away and for them to start watering properly again. All of which I used to get after wearing contact lenses during the day so hopefully it is just a transitional phase. The haze thing means I can't go to the cinema yet. Not unless I want everything to be misty. Not that there is anything I want to see. But it was on my list of things to do at some point. It's quite a vague list.

~~~~~

And this story has a picture of Freema Agyeman so some people might like it. The gist of the story is that there is no reason why traditionally white parts can't be played by black actors. The makers of this adaptation of some book or other are apparently  tremendously brave in casting Freema in such a role. It's a debate which has started cropping up. Everyone always says that Dickensian London was an ethnically diverse place (have we any actual evidence for that or is it just one of those things we're meant to accept? And how many of the non-white people were lowly servants brought home by their colonial masters as opposed to captains of industry and leading political figures?) I wonder whether this particular piece of casting came about because they decided they wanted a black actress and found one, whether they decided they wanted Freema and cast her or whether they had an open casting and picked the best woman for the job? And if we're handing out badges for courage, it would've been more courageous to cast an unknown black actress rather than the star of the most popular drama on BBC1. Looking at the bigger picture, I have no idea whether I'm in favour of this sort of thing or not. Imposing twenty first century values and culture on historical drama already happens with strong female characters created if none were present in the source text. A drama where the women are all meek and feeble is unlikely to get made these days even if it is a genuine bit of your actual culture. But do I want a version of Hound of the Baskervilles where Sir Henry Baskerville is black? Would an Asian Dr Mortimer make the adaptation better or more worthy? That's why I'm not sure - you're either in favour of colour-blind casting or you're not. You can't be pro- for minor roles but anti- for the main ones. I'd like to think things could muddle on with casting the best person for the role but things like this have a habit of becoming trends which become styles which become policies which become quotas which become pressure groups which become lawsuits which become annoying. And I find annoying things really irritating.

3rd May

Here's an interesting thing. On Thursday I was at the opticians for my one day post-op check and as I'm sitting there looking a bit focusy (or whatever the word is for someone who is looking at differently distanced things and testing their new found powers of focusing) when the guy sat opposite starts talking to me. He'd been zapped a month ago and everything was brilliant. He told me how he'd had a few days of dryness and the odd bit of blurriness and the red flecks around the iris and all the things I'm having now. He told me how it all gets better after a few days and it was the best thing he'd done in years. Et cetera. The point being that this is England and people don't talk to strangers in England.

Move forward to Friday and I went in PC World for a look round because I was meeting ShirtGuy for lunch at 1 and was early to avoid the lunchtime traffic. I went over to look at the big tellies - something I'd avoided getting in part at least because I didn't think I could see well enough to appreciate them. I was gazing at Robin Hood (having done a lap of the store because when I first arrived the BBC HD channel was showing so called "highlights" of Chelsea winning last season's FA Cup) when a PC World assistant came over and asked if she could be of any assistance. I should add that I'd knelt down to get a more realistic angle on this particular TV (because you don't tend to watch a TV by looking down on it at a 45 degree angle) and she sat down next to me. I let her know I wasn't really interested in buying a TV just now - I was just seeing what it looked like now I could see.

It turned into a conversation pretty quickly. It turns out she'd always wanted to join the fire brigade but they'd turned her down because she was so short sighted. They'd suggested laser surgery but she was too scared even to consider it. Now it was my turn to be the evangelist. I told her what actually happens. I told her that it isn't fun but it doesn't hurt. It's over really quickly, the recovery time is short and the effects are pretty stunning. She told me she had booked an eye test for today and would now ask them about a consultation. She wasn't scared any more. She covered her mouth in shock (in that way people do on television but not so much in real life) when I mentioned the flap they cut in your eyes but even that didn't put her off once I told her you don't know they're doing it. You don't know anything that they do. You just lie there, do what they say and try not to breathe too often. So that's how easy it is to help someone when you least expect to. I hope it all works out well for her. And I didn't fancy her so my motives were pure. Yay me.

1st May

I got zapped yesterday. This is what happened. If it doesn't quite make sense then I'm happy to blame the slight blurriness, bleariness and wateriness.

~~~~~

This is quite amusing. After all these years, the people of Lesbos have decided they want to reclaim the word lesbian.

The man spearheading the case, publisher Dimitris Lambrou, claims that international dominance of the word in its sexual context violates the human rights of the islanders, and disgraces them around the world.

Good use of the phrase "human rights". Surely a candidate for the phrase which has been cheapened beyond all recognition over the past few years. I don't know how this Greek chap thinks he's going to get the word lesbian removed from western society. Maybe via a long series of increasingly spurious lawsuits. A word of warning though - if lesbian goes there is a word waiting in reserve. "Gayelle" is the new "lesbian" apparently. Expect lawsuits from people called Gayle within the fortnight.

~~~~~

I've not voted today. I could've done - they sent me an invitation - but I don't want to. And I don't believe I should. There is a lot said about democracy and voting and how its a right and a privilege and a duty. People died for my right to vote and I'm grateful. I just don't think people should vote if they don't know what they're voting for. I'm ashamed to say I don't know who runs our local council. I have never taken any interest in local politics what so ever. Why should I spoil everything my casting a vote in the dark? I haven't got a clue who (if anyone) is any good. I could vote along strictly dogmatic party lines but what good would that be? There is too much emphasis on telling people they should vote and not enough on encouraging people to know what they are voting for. If Boris Johnson wins the London Mayoral election it won't be because Londoners agree with his policies on transport, taxation, amenities, housing, the Olympics et al - it will be because they like him on Have I Got New For You and think it would be a jolly Wodehousian lark to have him as Mayor. And I'm not entirely sure I wouldn't vote for him myself given the chance. But that isn't right. People should vote because they care about what is being voted for and if they don't care, they shouldn't vote.

~~~~~

And the BBC iPlayer has launched on Virgin Media. We shall see if this is any better than the BBC content in Catch Up TV. I've just had a look at Saturday's Doctor Who. Apparently I missed a whole scene despite my V+ adding two minutes at the start. This is why the BBC are pioneering on-demand television - their schedules are nonsensical and it is more fun to build something cool than actually start programmes when they say they will.